What if you could love yourself fully, including your imperfections? What if you could love others in the same way? You might fear that by loving your anger or laziness, your addictions or your anxiety, that you will never change for the better, that you will become more angry, lazy, addicted, or anxious. But if you experiment, you will see that what happens is often the opposite. As you love and accept yourself in a bigger, wiser love, your fear and aggression, your neediness and inertia, lose their hold. The wise heart brings compassion to imperfection itself. With mindfulness you can become the love you have sought. And with this love you are also returned to yourself.
Try it. Imagine you were to love yourself just as you are – with all these human flaws. Every human has imperfections; this is part of human incarnation. Your task is to see them clearly and love anyway. Now become the loving awareness that can witness and hold your life with its successes and imperfections in a sea of love. Who you are is not the flaws and trauma and fears. These are outer human struggles. You are timeless awareness, born with original beauty, the child of the spirit having a complicated human incarnation, like the other 7 billion of us.
With this deep acceptance and loving awareness, step out of the judge’s court. Invite yourself to become quiet, at ease with your whole self, kind and thoughtful. With this accepting presence you will see yourself make better choices – not out of shame or self-hate, but because your loving heart teaches you how to care. The loving heart transforms the whole human dance. After you practice embracing your imperfections, you can choose other people to include in this practice. See and accept all their imperfections with a profound loving awareness. Take your time. Notice how this acceptance changes your conflicts and feelings for the better. Other people are learners, just as you are. And when you envision loving them with all their flaws, notice how your loving gaze and care might inspire the best in them. As Nelson Mandela says, “It never hurts to see the good in someone. They often act the better because of it.”
Love yourself. This is the essence. Then take your very human imperfections and make beauty anyway.